My friend’s ‘obnoxious’ brother is causing us to fight

My friend’s ‘obnoxious’ brother is causing us to fight

DEAR ABBY: My husband, “Alex,” and I are shut buddies with one other couple who dwell out of state. Throughout a digital comfortable hour, our pal “Darlene” suggested us that her brother “Roy” is transferring to our space, and he or she urged we develop into buddies. She assumed my husband likes Roy. My husband answered truthfully and mentioned he doesn’t notably like Roy. When Darlene pressed, eager to know why, Alex once more answered truthfully. He mentioned he thinks Roy is obnoxious. 

We’ve got hung out with Darlene’s household and customarily take pleasure in them, however we wouldn’t search out a relationship with Roy. It doesn’t imply Alex hates him. When my husband made the remark, she didn’t reply or appear upset. I texted her to apologize, and he or she replied, “No have to apologize. I simply didn’t know Alex didn’t like Roy.” 

Two weeks later, she confronted me about it. She mentioned my husband was impolite and her brother had achieved nothing to him to deserve being known as obnoxious, including that Roy is a superb individual. We went forwards and backwards, and I gave her a few days’ break from communication as a result of she was clearly upset. 

We revisited the difficulty right now, and he or she’s nonetheless upset. She will not be upset with me, although. I urged she attain out to my husband, however she believes that he ought to attain out to her. Honestly, I don’t suppose my husband did something incorrect, though he may have been extra diplomatic. What do you suppose? — STUCK IN THE MIDDLE

DEAR STUCK: Your husband was sincere about his emotions, however he ought to have been extra tactful than to accuse Darlene’s brother of being “obnoxious.” In the event you and your husband worth the connection you’ve along with her and her husband, then he ought to attain out to her and apologize for his lack of tact. Nevertheless, neither of you must permit your self to be guilted into interacting with Roy in opposition to your higher judgment.

DEAR ABBY: I’m broke and disabled and dwell removed from family and friends. They know I dwell alone and that I’m lonely with no buddies close by. Each time I attempt to save up the $1,000 I would like to go to, some pressing expense takes it away. I haven’t been dwelling in 10 years, and it’s killing me. 

Two of my finest buddies lately got here into sum of cash, round $100,000 or extra. Neither one has provided to offer or lend me a dime. I’m very harm by this as a result of I used to be at all times beneficiant once I had cash. Do I’ve a proper to really feel harm? How can I let this go so it doesn’t have an effect on our friendships? — SUFFERING IN COLORADO

DEAR SUFFERING: Your emotions are your emotions, and you’ve got a proper to them. Nevertheless, it’s unrealistic to anticipate your pals to provide the cash to go to them. You might need higher luck in the event you invite them to go to you. 

Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jeanne Phillips, and was based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Contact Expensive Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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